Polemic®

McCain actually lost a point today, the day after the Palin speech.

By and large that was a boiler plate speech that any Conservatron would have made against any Democrat in the last 40 years. Without the context it could just as well have been a Fourth of July stump speech by the wannabe Representative of Michigan’s 4th. The recollection of the war hero piece was strong, but Bush Patsy McCain ruined it by being snarky and turning it into a cudgel. At the end of that bit I felt like I had just earned extra credit in my seventh grade social studies class.

The speech was so weak because it was apologetic. After serving penance for being a Conservatron, Bush Patsy McCain said that Republicans “believe in rewarding hard work” and “a strong defense”! Well, ya’ don’t say! So do I! I believe in the deliciousness of ice cream too! I know that Bush Patsy McCain was using fnords based on ancient racially-tinged characterizations of the Great Society and left-wing anti-Vietnam war movement; but the implication that you favor hard work and your opponent doesn’t sounds childish.

Sad fact is, Bush Patsy McCain was only relevant when he was debasing the Republican Party and the “establishment” that he has been a part of for 26 years.

This was a candle compared to Obama’s magnetic New Jacksonianism. The replacement of the crowd of real people that watched Obama’s speech with Conservatron robots was stark and, as is always the case with Republicans, a little creepy.

Oh, and I loved the “McCain Mavrick” sign. Maybe that guy went to a charter school.

Update: Bleeeh! What is it about Conservatron Convention Crowds that just screams “worst sex ever!”

Alaska Police Union Files Complaint Against Palin

Don’t forget that she was also Field Marshall of the Alaska Police and routinely sent them on raids against Canadian communists.

What’s the difference between Odysseus and a hockey mom? Lipstick.

Field Marshall Palin started her career at (1) Hawaii Pacific University, then to (2) North Idaho College, near where Mark Fuhrman lives, then to (3) the University of Idaho, then to (4) Matanuska-Susitna College in Alaska (which I hear is the Harvard of the North), then back to (5) Idaho.

Umm. I think that’s really four. 

Something tells me that her shitty education is only going to make her more popular.  It worked for W.

Palin delivers snarky substance free cuntiness in speech.

McClatchy.

But according to St. McCain this makes her more qualified than Obama who’s never “been south of the border.”

Is the media going to call bullshit on this, or let the Republicans say anything they want as usual?

Really.

The comparison was too apt to keep these too apart. Isn’t this radcore! My mom is going to be vice-president and fuckin-redneck and I are going to make celeb friends!!!!

http://abcnews.go.com/Blotter/story?id=5713866

Via–of all places–NRO.  (For that reason, I’m pasting a screen shot before it disappears.)

More from Josh.

Rough transcript here.

More at Kos.

(iow, no fair talking about Bristol Palin because she’s turned into an uneducated breeding machine, while Chelsea, who got an education and went on to work at McKinsey is not where the GOP wants to see women.)

Tonight, in what will be the most maudlin moment in modern American history, a cavalcade of creepy cardboard cutout sanctimonious moralizers will give a standing O to seventeen year old Prego Bristol and The Fucking Redneck. A Kodiak moment for hypocrites everywhere.

The conventional wisdom is that Nilap (”Nil” meaning “no” and “ap” meaning “aptitude,” by the way) just needs to avoid a gaffe and an overall sense of Quayleness to pass this test. A nice getting to know you might have sufficed had Nilap’s supposed claim to reformer fame not been contradicted by past actions, like being for the bridge to nowhere before she was agianst. To earn America’s respect after this goopy soap opera, Nilap needs to have something meaningful to say about jobs, the economy, and even foreign policy. The “normalness” of Prego seventeen year olds, “The Fuckin’ Redneck,” DUIs, Jews for Jesus, petty small town hatreds, hunting wildlife from helicopters, firing librarians, denying global warming, fighting weird in-law rivalries through firing public servants, and playing footsie with half-baked secessionist parties just won’t cut the mustard.

Even absent all of the scandalous personal details, it appears that for Nilap there is no there there. Dems should quickly contradict every bogus claim she makes and counter punch like crazy for the rest of the Conservatron Convention.

Messianic “Jew” bullshit promoted by Palin’s pastor.

So, even though the New Testament essentially revokes the Torah, this somehow works for some people. Oy.

UPDATE: McCain camp denies that she agress with JFJ that Israel terrorism is for rejecting Christ.  Goes no further.

I told Cindy to watch out.

No, seriously.  He had criticized her for pork-barrel stuff.  But, I guess they’re cool now. Or something.

Thom Hartmann just referenced the bikini photo

Polemic Palinic being viewed at the Obama camp!

Check this piece out.

If Trig was Sarah Palin’s, her water broke in fucking Dallas and she flew home, skipped the hospital with a natal intensive care unit and drove another hour to a non-specialist to have the baby and was back at work in three days, all with a premature baby at risk for Down syndrome?

Gevalt.  Methinks she is either going to get caught with a lie here, and this is Bristol’s second time at the rodeo, or else she should go to prison for child endangerment, since, you know after all, fetuses are equal, right?

As predicted below, the “victimization” of the everymom continues. Supposedly, Nilap’s failure to teach her daughter about contraception and the existence of a down syndrome baby only make her more “normal.”

Problem is, we are electing a vice-president, not a mascot.

Per “An Evolutionary Psychology of Leader/Follower Relations” all aspects of a leader’s life are valid because a leader needs the authority to organize people and punish free riders. A follower is less likely to trust in a leader they consider immoral, and of bad judgment, no matter how good his policies are.

So how do some politicians survive personal scandals like Nilap’s? Simple, their policies and ideas are relevant.

Look at the master. Bill Clinton survived countless bimbo eruptions in ‘92 by continuing to talk to people, to understand their frustrations, and explain what he could do about it. His hornballery became “well that’s just how people are” rather than a disqualification because his ideas were meaningful to a multitude of Americans. What did Bubba do at his SOTU at the height of Monicagate? He just talked about policies, ideas and the country while ignoring the scandal. The Conservatrons and MSM hated it; the people loved it.

The Conservatrons don’t care about Nilap’s petty small-town rivalries, the hypocrisy embedded in her daughters tummy by a “fucking redneck,” or the rest because her goof city stances on creationism and abortion etc. are important to them.

I suspect the rest of America is not concerned with how well they can relate to Nilap. Her “normalness” does not put food on the table or help pay the mortgage. Most importantly, it does not demonstrate that she can be president. Nate nailed this with his post “The Essential Difference” on fivethirtyeight.com: a VP becomes President in a time of crisis. The President has just been assassinated, killed in an accident or a health tragedy, or is medically disabled. We all know the picture of LBJ being sworn in on an airplane, Jackie Kennedy beside him, with JFK’s dead body in the cargo hold. Are you really comfortable with Sarah Nilap playing the LBJ role in a similar tragedy?

I honestly cannot fathom how anyone takes Bush Patsy McCain, Nilap or the Conservatrons seriously at this point.

Palin’s car wash shut down for failing to pay business tax.

Palin line-item vetoes money for teenage moms.

You need to go spend time with your family, don’t you, Sarah?

Heeb wonders out loud.

OK, so that wouldn’t make the baby Jewish, unless, gasp! you go according to the liberal Reform movement that allows patrilineal descent.  I’m going with the Orthodox on this one–I don’t really think Baby Bristol+Levi would be a mensch fomenting armaggeddon in Israel and all.

Not content to leave the masterstroke choice of Sarah Palin on its own, John McCain has announced another pick in the mold of Sarah Palin for Secretary of State:

Wonkette has the Sarah Palin “premature withdrawal” watch here.  As my sister put it, too bad the “fuckin’ redneck” didn’t prematurely withdraw with Bristol.

Intrade’s market had Joe Biden in the 90s before the announcement, and near 100 after it.  Palin? She’s still at 94.

So, now all of the Republicans want us to be nice to family members? They don’t want mean and they don’t want smears?  Hmph. You only have to go back a few weeks to John Edwards… nevermind.  The hypocrisy is mind blowing.

UPDATE: Who vetted Palin? Dobson and Norquist.

Last week, while the media focused almost obsessively on the DNC’s spectacle in Denver, the country’s most influential conservatives met quietly at a hotel in downtown Minneapolis to get to know Sarah Palin. The assembled were members of theCouncil for National Policy, an ultra-secretive cabal that networks wealthy right-wing donors together with top conservative operatives to plan long-term movement strategy.

CNP members have included Tony Perkins, James Dobson, Grover Norquist, Tim LaHaye and Paul Weyrich. At a secret 2000 meeting of the CNP, George W. Bush promised to nominate only pro-life judges; in 2004, then-Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist told the group, “The destiny of the nation is on the shoulders of the conservative movement.” This year, thanks to Sarah Palin’s selection, the movement may have finally aligned itself behind the campaign of John McCain.

In other words, they either told McCain to pick her or they would be staying home… or they punk’d him. Tim LaHaye–what he writes books about the end of the world… fuck me. These people are crazy.

UPDATE: Wow. Just… Wow.  Damn, she’s kind of hot….. The only thing missing from this pic is some camel toe–or maybe “moose knuckle” since she’s from Aleyeska.

A moment of clarity:

Of course Bush Patsy McCain and his Rover handlers knew about the Bristol Bany! Their strategy was to carefully roll Nilap out as an easily emphatic “hockey mom”. Then, once the teenage pregnancy popped out, goad the MSM to, hopefully — if you’re a Conservatron — with an assist from the Obama campaign, pile on to the Nilap’s to the point of ridicule and meanness. The Conservatrons would then use the echo chamber of their theofascist wing, which is so excited about Nilap, to ferment a backlash against the nasty treatment of this “everywoman” who is so lovingly just contending with a plain ol’ difficult mother/daughter situation just like any tough working mom would do! Aw schucks!

Recall that the backlash by boomer women over HRC’s New Hampshire tear up was egged on by the condescending hee haw of Conservatron swine like Rush Limbaugh. Methinks the Conservatrons were hoping to manufacture that lightening in a bottle here. Note that the Bush Patsy McCain camp said they were revealing the Great Land Prego due to the rumors of “liberal bloggers” not because this is the sort of crap that every Prez or Veep family must cough up.

The second half of this strategy would be to go ultra-negative on Obama and hope that the Conservatron base + outraged Clintonettes turned Nilapsers + terrified independents would barely get Bush Patsy McCain a 49.5% to 48.9% sort of victory.

With an Act of God named Gustav sucking up all the oxygen, however, the Nilap family values are left flapping in the wind like so many maternity dresses with no media bloviators about to create or defend a “victim”. Meanwhile, Generalissimo Bush’s reprehensible handling of Katrina has forced Bush Patsy McCain to play “statesman” with Gustav (Demonstrating basic concern for your fellow human counts as “statesman” if you’re a Conservatron), scotching one day of the convention and making it incredibly difficult to pull off the remainder of the scheduled Four Day Hate without looking like an utter douche. Obama wisely said that the Nilap grandkidlet is off limits. Now Nilap will have to prove that she should be one injured elderly heartbeat away from the presidency given her non-existent resume on her own accord.

Update: The McCain camp, led by Rove Acolyte Schmidt, is now calling the Nilap coverage “offensive.”

So the Eagleton scenario continues.

Palin’s daughter is now 5 months pregnant, 17 years old, and unmarried.  Though she will marry the dad.  Umm… and this is OK with the “excited” Christian Right?

So, just so I’m sure:

teenage sex = ok
fornication = ok
premarital sex = ok

but abortion not ok.

These people have such wonderful family values. 

Palin is turning into a process story about McCain’s failure to vet, which goes to the “judgment” argument.